Very young mothers!!!!!

Comments

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Hiya Eunuch! Let me tell you a few stories: The 12 year old sitting in my clinic, pregnant to "someone". The "someone" was thought to be her mothers boyfriend. She had never had a period. Frightened. Wearing loads of makeup so she could look like the other women sitting in the clinic. All girls under the age of 15 are reported to DoC's. I can only hope they looked after her. The 16 year old who planned her pregancy to keep her boyfriend. And then he left her. Few job skills, no job, no support to even get a job. Her parents did not approve of her behaviour. She was not invited home. The 17 year old who didn't know who the father was. She was hoping it was this famous "footballer" but the ultrasounds disappointed. The father of the baby no longer around. She went back home to her dad's place. The 16 year old that was pregnant and her mother (aged mid 30's) got pregnant too, so the kids could grow up together. The 22 year old who I saw just a couple of weeks ago - her baby is now 5. She is working, still with her boyfriend and saving up to buy a house :-) The 25 year old who emailed me the other day to say that she now has 3 kids aged 7, 5 and 3, still with her man, and just finished her nursing degree :-) Generally I have found that the teenage girls that have good family support and/or and older boyfriend who works, will successfully raise a baby. Young girls are actually good mothers in a baby sitting kind of way. It's when the baby starts to become independent that the fostering rates go up. These young mums who do not have the support will bottom out. They do not have job skills, they do not have school qualifications, they cannot drive. They need support. Hello Mr Abbott? what happened to your pregnancy help service? Oh no one used it because the support needs to be ongoing, not just for the duration of the pregnancy....I see. The biological clock is raging at 14. It is a natural hormonal urge to respond to it. Childbirth is generally easy for these girls...they have no fear and just get on with it. Very low cesarean rates in this demograghic. However, their brains are not mature enough to make the decisions required for parenting. Safe sex is a big issue - because it is so far off their radar. Many don't know how to open a condom packet let alone put one on a guy. I don't know the solution to further awareness with this one....big billboards with graphic diseases on them??? Nah, the Govt wouldn't be able to cope with the "Fred Nile" lash back. Abortions cost approx $345...what 14 year old has that kind of money? Her options are limited if she does not have family support. I think the key lies in health and education working together. Hmmmmmmmmm. Tricky, because education want the evidence or stats that "awareness" programs work to include them in the school curriculums. Health need to be able to roll them out to get the evidence!!! Arrrgh! Btw, both my girls have seen birth DVD's....my youngest daughter (9) is NEVER going to have a baby, my eldest daughter(12) doesn't want to know yet. For me as a parent it's about keeping that door open, and giving them the information they need at the right time, rather than telling them what I think. An actions have consequences type thing. But hey, check back with next year LOL I am curious to know how fathers educate, or have educated their sons about all things sex.... Jx

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  I think society as a whole (but especially Oprah...I'm sure she wasn't the only activist, just the one I happened to see LOL) has a lot to answer for with the new 'better' way of raising kids. Instead of being able to PARENT children as our parents parented us and their parents before them, we are forced to conform to societies ideals about what is appropriate parenting. Kids these days, if they tell the teacher they were given a smack at home then that teacher is required to report it or at least make note of it. My issue is not with whether or not to smack, however as I very very rarely use this and when I do its more for the shock value of 'don't you run out onto the road' type situations. My issue is that, most of us had a direct cause/effect upbringing - we were treated as children who were only LEARNING to become responsible and moral adults and we weren't expected to know and process things the way an adult would...yet by sitting down and talking things through with our kids as the only 'effect' of their action as though they can process things like mini adults we are forcing them to grow up too soon. They are becoming too self confident...no, make that cocky, too selfish, too materialistic and don't seem to get that their actions don't always have a 'sit down and chat' consequence, but can have life long consequences too. Wow...what a rant! LOL OneBrightStar - thanks for your experience and insight. You know, even as a 22yo pregnant with my first I was often treated as a child who got herself into a sticky situation. Some of the comments I got were amazing! I enjoyed being able to put them in their place by telling them that I had, in fact, already been married almost 3 years when I fell pregnant.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  If your into social anthropology, some girls have no status within their families and it is a way to achieve it. For others with few options it is a career path. There is a lot more to it and I would love to hear some more points of view on it. Miss K

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  This is something that interests me greatly.Why are yung children in this day and age conceiving? is it to do with socioeconomic standards?Is it educational standards Are the parents at fault?is it older boys forcing the issuePerhaps a combination of both?Are the parents of 15 yr old girls supervising them?One can only hope that 73 girls aged 15 and under were not victims of crime , such as rape and incest.Is it the fact that young girls think one cannot get pregnant the first time?Do they think of pregnancy ?This is a huge can of worms and should be addressed before we have more children having childrenPersonally I think 15 is a child and too young to be having childrenI give thanks to my mother for making me aware that one of the side effects of unprotected sex is children!!!!!Thanks Mum xxx

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Quoting 'OneBrightStar'Abortions cost approx $345...what 14 year old has that kind of money? Her options are limited if she does not have family support. easier access to RU486 and contraceptive pills would be a good thing IMO. (yes, the pill is easy to get if you're a grown up, but for young'uns I don't think so - even buying condoms is an ordeal, hell even some adults get embarassed doing it)Is there much greater reporting of child pregnancies too? didn't those girls get quietly shuffled off to their aunt's place in the country in years gone by?

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Much appreciate your input and the valued insight people here have to offer. Can only imagine that pregnancy and life changing potential that results is something akin to someone diving into shallow water, injuring their head and the lasting effects they are left with. That's probably overstating it... though the handicap of being a child caring for a child without a proper support mechanism is sure to thwart further education and job possibilities. Thus impacting not only on their opportunities but hinder or even halt them reaching their full potential... not only for the young mother but also the child. They are inoculating young girls against the virus that causes cervical cancer, would it be politically incorrect or medically unsound for girls undergoing puberty to be given contraceptive injections at regular intervals? This suggestion applies to boys too when a suitable injection is developed.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  And how many of these single young mums go back and have more children?? The sad part is a lot of these babies may grow up not even knowing their father. Thats so very sad too !!

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  If I were minister for unwanted pregnancies, I'd be providing free condoms in schools. So many sexually active teenagers are too embarrassed to go into a chemist and buy them... and when the time comes that they need one... they havent got one... and .. pop goes the weasel. Hugs Stalky

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Quoting 'sydneyboy3au' Quoting 'OneBrightStar'Abortions cost approx $345...what 14 year old has that kind of money? Her options are limited if she does not have family support. easier access to RU486 and contraceptive pills would be a good thing IMO. (yes, the pill is easy to get if you're a grown up, but for young'uns I don't think so - even buying condoms is an ordeal, hell even some adults get embarassed doing it)Is there much greater reporting of child pregnancies too? didn't those girls get quietly shuffled off to their aunt's place in the country in years gone by? Yes, you are right SydneyBoy...RU486 (the abortion pill) would be better, but unfortunately it is severly restricted in Australia. ObGyn Consultants are the only people who can apply to have prescribing rights. It is restricted to medical abortion only. Govt Red Tape. GP access to prescribing rights of this pill would enable young girls more choice. Kids 15 years and older can have their own Medicare card, so in fact can access medical care without their parents knowing. Now this is something that should be more widely acknowledged. Just to put things in perspective re-teen pregnancies, the hospital I work at has about 5000 births per year - last year 91 teenagers under 18 years had a baby. In another hospital down the road, the birth rate is about 3700, with 163 teens giving birth. I'll stop now before I make another....errr, conference presentation :P Jx

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  16 years ago

  A very logical and wise answer, I'm sure your clinic is all the better for having you there.As to what a father teaches his kids, well I'm not there yet but do remember my father always pointing out the girls on the sidewalk as we passed by when I was in my teens. Lucky I was the shy type but also I always perceived this as a derogatory way of looking at women even though my father was very much the old school gentleman (no one is perfect). As for what I'll teach my kids; the most important woman in their world is their mother and they should endeavour to treat other women with the same respect they show their mother. I've always been one for treat as you want to be treated.

  reply

  like