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M56

Too fussy?

November 05 2012

couples

All right, as a relative newcomer to the scene... My lady and I decided to get into this scene in September for a few reasons, not least to improve our own intimacy and sex life - although we're both quite horny by nature. I want to stress this hasn't become a problem - yet. We agreed on MMF, FFM where we could (I'm OK looking but realistic) and swapping partners with other couples. The research I'd done told me to expect this, but we've been swamped with single guys looking for couples, and frankly the couples we have met were either flat out scary or only one of us was attracted to the other corresponding person. I've also found this site - although it's great - to have the potential to hit the jackpot daily, as long as you're willing to significantly lower or drop your standards completely. We've only played four or five times so far, all as MMF - which I like, don't get me wrong as I love seeing my girl go right off with two gents. I'm starting to think that I'm dragging the chain, though. My lady is stunning, and I've been with her for 13 years. I'm sorry, but I want my first experience with another woman to be visually and mentally, well, pretty good. I'm not a snob, but Christ. It was suggested to me that I'm too fussy in my choices (or lack thereof). I don't want to drop out of the scene for all sorts of reasons, and will persist. Will my situation improve, or do I start sleeping with anyone just to go through the motions?

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Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Just to let you know you are probably going to be slammed for saying what you have and in the way that you have. But no don't drop your standards. You should only have sex with people you are sexually attracted to and of course the women your wife is attracted too. Your research should have also showed you that there are a lot more men here than women so your chances of meeting women is not as high. Also there are not that many girls who are into meeting up with couples. I suggest you also go to swingers parties and events and one day you will meet someone you are both attracted too. It takes time.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    By the way the fact that you have only been on RHP for 2-3 months and have already had four or five play dates is pretty good odds!

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  • Lifes_great

    Lifes_great

    13 years ago

    I'm not part of the couple's scene but I'm guessing it's the same as being single and meeting people. It's all a matter of choice and there is certainly nothing wrong with wanting to be attracted to whom you choose to be with.   I'm with Meeka here......2 - 3 months and a handful of play dates already.....fussy nah....greedy...maybe...lol.   Good luck with your search, just hang in there.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Meeka, I appreciate your honesty, and that it will take time. I've seen how much fun my lady's having and I just want some of that too. I also realise that diamonds are pretty hard to find in the NT talent pool (we're originally Vics, by the way). It does frustrate me a bit - not to the detriment of our relationship, I might add - and I know the time will come. I suppose the important point is that the other day we met a couple just for a drink. My lady was OK with the M, but I just couldn't see anything between me and the F. I said no thank you later - which was accepted with grace - but then I was said to have been too fussy. So - do I play with a lady I'm not attracted to to keep my own lady happy, or do I stand my ground and stick to my guns?

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    can answer that question OP,but why would you want to have sex with a woman you just aren't attracted to?I can't imnagine that any woman would want you to either....ok well maybe some, but IMO that would be a souless and empty experience for both of you . Good luck in your search

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Who was it that said you were "too fussy", your partner or the other couple, or some mates at the pub?

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    If you are looking for someone as hot and attractive as your lady then it probably will be hard to find. Maybe dont drop your standards but be more open look at things that you find desirable...large breasts...blonde hair whatever floats your boat.Sometimes they can be a stunner in the looks department and a looser in the bedroom???? You might be doing yourself out of some amazing sex.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quality of sex is usually inversely proportional to looks for woman that is . Most men are natural born good fuckers .

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    You're picky. And you should be. p.s. I like the way you talk about your wife.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    You and your partner are here to fullfill certain fantasies and nothing more. Why should you be expected to drop your standards? Neither of you NEED the extra play friends they are just an enhancement to what you already share so if one of you is not being enhanced...then dont go there!!!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    ..........are In a constant state of flux for me. If there is a woman who wants to be a part of a fantasy of mine, welcome to my fantasy!!!!but by the same token, would I ever see her again or consider a relationship? That's a completely different ball game I am absurdly fussy when it comes to choosing women despite my own modest appearances. It's just one of my insane quirks lol

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Saskia, It was my lady, but I suspect that she wouldn't have minded a piece of the M we met! Blue Eyes, I'm not looking for the complete package, because my lady's it. All I'd like is a little bit of personality, someone who can smile and I have a conversation with, and a teeny tiny spark of mutual attraction and I'll have no problems. I know it's relatively early days, but I'm not prepared to fuck someone who doesn't interest me just to say I've had a play. There has to be some type of mental element as well.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Miss Devious, You've gone and made me blush now!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    I suspected it might have been your partner. In which case I don't agree with one part of a couple having to 'take one for the team'. If you are going to open your relationship up to something that could very well have serious implications should anything go wrong, then you have every right to be picky, there are so many more dynamics to consider when you are talking about 4 people choosing to share a night of debauchery. Everyone needs to feel comfortable, happy and at the end of the day (or rather night) fulfilled. Hold onto your standards.

    reply

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Passion = knowing WHAT you want and accepting nothing less. So be PASSIONATE about your play. See?? I do learn :p

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    It's actually pretty funny, this site has made me incredibly fussy. Actually almost celibate.Pretty Ironic really. But you know what? I applaud those who are hanging in here till all their bells and whistled are clanged and blown.I'm no way confident enough or inclined to be a one night stand man. But if I'm going to find a regular play mate, we are going to think each other is something special.You be fussy..~holds thumb perpendicular~

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    It's totally your business, but how come you have a single profile?? Is there a couple profile somewhere??

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    "You're not fussyYou're picky. And you should be. " Im with you DeviousMissM. Everyones different & thats their own right to be. Nothing wrong with that.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'trouserwowser' Im with you DeviousMissM. Everyones different & thats their own right to be. Then get your own colour!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    l applaud little red engines comments.

    reply

  • RHP

    RHP User

    13 years ago

    Quoting 'splashagold'l applaud little red engines comments. *Claps*

    reply

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