M48
A disgusting accusation
February 11 2010
Comments
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RHP User
16 years ago
Hey Ridge, Been called a "metro-sexual" should be taken as a compliment. From my undersstanding it's a man whom knows what is required to undertaken to improve appearance with aim to attract a lady. (Actually a higher class lady, such as porn stars ;o) ). Here in Oz, majority of males are brutes and do not look after themselves. Do you really think they'd be stars in such films?? All non metro-sexuals are only lowering the par for those whom are understanding of women. Not in any way does been called "metro-sexual" mean that one is calling another bi-sexual. Sorry I just did not want metro and gay to be in the same sentance. Grooming, shavind, moisturising, good shampoo, latest fashion clothing, attractive underwear, flashy shoes, all go towards a male been vane in the knowlegde of a female undertaking the exact same motions to attract a male. If they do it, they why shouldn't we. They appreciate it and we appreciate it. Come to think of it, maybe metro-sexual is another term for been vane?? Plus metro-sexuals are way more attractive later in life with no wrinkles, no unshaven faces, clear complexions than their counterparts, the brute male. Why should there be a metr-sexual annoymous meeting for those who actually care about how they look? Now on the other hand, some women are attracted to the brute. But metro-sexuals have the upper hand as they too can easily go to the gym and have even larger muscles, but I say to the ladies, *If you ladies had two men in front of you, who'd you choose, the metro-sexual or the brute? Both are of same height, tan and build.** Lets see how the question goes and I do hpe your much comfortable with been labelled a metro-sexual. Chiverlyone PS: I'm metro-sexual, straight, and can pack one hell of a punch in a fight. Can play both roles, brute and metro.
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RHP User
16 years ago
Well Ridge.. you do seem to have overdone it a little on the product.There'll be no room in the van for all that stuff.... what with all the extra lube and such we'll be carrying.. some things have to go... palmolive honey shower milk for a start... I mean, I'll wash your back .. and you can wash mine... I happen to have an anti wrinkle cream you can borrow... you just smear it in and let it set... it feels a little crackly at first but it's the same one Cameron Diaz didnt seem to mind in that movie so I guess you'll get used to it. Being Metro has nothing to do with a person's sexuality Ridge. You can be a very masculine guy... which you almost are, discounting for the product, and still be gay... so it's really no indication... however, being in touch with your feminine side.. well, that's definitely metro. We, as in Jeano and me at least, (as opposed to "us") don't understand women at all and we accept that there is no hope, so we don't try, even though Jeano i spretty darn good at covering that up... And your mistake is that this is not about bathing.... it's because the more product you use the closer you get to your feminine side... which means if you start to smell like a woman, don't be surprised when Jeano jumps you in the dead of night... I mean, you've seen him dance... so you really ought to fear the experience of him demonstrating the doggy sex thing he talks about! De-metro... by emptying your beauty bag in the bin and hand that bag back to your mum. She's been looking for it. As for .. "MA meetings ~ do I have their number".... I'm not attracted to girly type men so the answer is simply no. :p Hugs Stalkyboy
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N4November
16 years ago
Recommended Actions Required to De-Metro your Straight Arse: 1. Put your (sexy) self on a plane; 2. Fly to Newcastle; 3. Get picked up by Baygirl2315; 4. She will fuck you senseless; 5. Blow you every which way and sideways; and 6. Return your dirty sweaty body home on a plane (without showering) smelling distinctly like sex; and 7. When you get home exhausted, spent and hardly walking; the realisation that you haven't even showered will shock you completely and that you have in fact "manned up" as a result. You will savour the sensation of how good it feels to be so fuc*ing dirty from sex again - and not a product in sight or even thought of. De-Metro Sexualisaton Complete. call me...... promise i will fix you
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Mr_Invisible
16 years ago
Your biggest problem is you not only admit to using the productsBut know the brand names etcSorry... your going over to that side and nothing short of a bushmans hankie and a drive in a V8 will cure you
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RHP User
16 years ago
Hey Stalky... I was already a little worried about Jeano. Now that it's out in the open, and I've discovered that I'm a little bit girly, I'm starting to reconsider going on this trip. I like Jeano and all... but I'm a bit scared that he might like my man-smell a little bit too much... They say he's hung like a donkey, and don't want a donkey sneaking into my bunk while I'm asleep. I think we need to schedule a pre-departure crisis meeting... :P We need to deal with my product obsession.
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RHP User
16 years ago
I have nothing against gay men, and I don't think they're all metros. lol. One of my bestest bestest mates is actually gay... and he is most definitely not a metro... haha. Just posting this in good fun... on reading it again, it may have come across as a little abrasive so I do apologise if I have upset anyone :( I was just a little rattled after my man-ness was doubted... PS... That definition of a metro that I gave was actually given to me by a gay person... lol. So don't read too much into that either... I'm not here to pick on anyone. (God... I'm getting all sensitive now too!! I really am getting all girly??)
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RHP User
16 years ago
You cant delay the trip .. cant you see there will be thousands of dissapointed lovers waiting at their front gates for a van that does not arrive? No, my friend, no. You sound like a wimp now. What you have to do.. and be pretty smart about doing it, is man up and get yourself on that plane to Newcastle just as the delightful Miss baygirl has suggested and take your medicine like a man, not some pimped up half pretty hairless ballsacked flower smelling tree hugging fancy watch wearing david beckham product wearing metro sexual. Come home smelling like sex and armpits.. throw the product away, and take 20 minutes to sniff yourself then look in the mirror and repeat after me 20 times... "I love smelling like this, all covered in love crumbs"... now get on that bus soldier. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
16 years ago
I'm on my way... See you in 9 hours. I'll drive.
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting: 'How do I de-metro myself?? Pleeeease fix me!!!' Dont. U r doing just fine. Just my opininon.( stole that line from some smart chick...heheheh)
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RHP User
16 years ago
but thats a definite no vote for using Palmolive Honey Shower milk - though that is something like its full name, I just call it soap, or shower gel. But that stuff smells pretty damn good, I got a smaller one as handwash stuff too... cause the solvol doesn't smell so great when you've had your hands in an engine (or, has anyone ever smelt hockey gloves? it's special)Now, I have to ask, how did you describe it? because, maybe therein lies the key to the vile accusation made against you.Compare and contrast "shower milk" vs "shower gel" vs "soap" (though it may not technically be a soap, and less of a 'gel' consistancy than many other shower gels)And you didn't use the phrase, 'fabulous', 'scrumptious' (or 'scrummy') at all?
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RHP User
16 years ago
I PREFER BRIT GUYS IV NEVER REALLY GONE OUT WITH ANY OZ GUYS AND PART OF THE REASON IS BECAUSE I DONT THINK THEY DO TAKE THAT GOOD A CARE OF THEMSELVES.....MIND U SOMETIMES MY EX WOULD COME OUT WITH THESE LEARY SHIRTS AND SHOES ON AND ID POINT BLANK REFUSE 2 GO OUT WITH HIM LOOKIN LIKE THAT....DONT EVEN START ME ON HIS VANS SHOES...BUT F YA THINK YR ATTRACTIN THE RIGHT KINDA GIRLS WELL DONT BOTHER CHANGIN...HALF THE TIME OZ GUYS ASK ME OUT IN IM SITTIN THERE THINKIN THEY NEED A SHAVE...........N I PREFER THE APRI FACIAL SCRUB N THE SOAPS FROM LUSH..........GO SNIFF THAT STORE I LOVE IT
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RHP User
16 years ago
WOULD'NT THE REAL RIDGE FORESTER BE CONSIDERED METRO SEXUAL...................LOL
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RHP User
16 years ago
I think most women on this site would agree, you could do them as a metro sexual, a rural sexual.....just ANYTHING sexual! :)
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RHP User
16 years ago
As for the metro sexuals that i know they arn't gay..they are just as manly has any man i know.It's that they like to take care of themselves and present well...give me a man that does anytime.and besides i'd rather a hand that is smooth with clean neat fingernails...heheJust like there is women who do take care of themselves and present well.Just as there are for every man that doesn'tthere is a woman also.So whats the problem, if people want to to take pride in their appearance if it makes them feel good about themselvesand if in turn attracts others I for one don't think it's vanity.....a vain person is one that takes it to the extreme.think they are better than anyone else.in looks.xoxoxheymummakeep it up ridge
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RHP User
16 years ago
dont worry i get wise cracks about going shopping, my knowledge of women and worrying about my hair.. luckily iam all man....and girls, couples never doubt that when we play ...lol Usually its wise cracks from scruffy girls or yobbo aussie guys...so i just laugh and make jokes :) Good to look after yourself and improve yourself ...for YOU have fun Neo
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RHP User
16 years ago
You and mumma are just being seduced by his beautiful smile, straight teeth, devilish demeanre and charisma. A guy really is only attractive in the flesh if he smells like a guy... so that his pheremones aren't being blocked... and all that mush he uses... well you wait and see when the caravan comes by... his masculinity is being masked by the remnants of that mudpack he used to clean his pores.... No. No. No. Ridge. A bit of palmolive gold and a subtle hint of cologne is all you need.... sure gargle, brush and trim... if you need moisturiser on your face... just get some very accomodating lady to sit on it. HUgs Stalky
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RHP User
16 years ago
or should you just grab a plane to Newcastle,," the proof is in the pudding"
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RHP User
16 years ago
hahahaha oh stalki....i f i were to pamper you with doing your hair.face.and a manicure n pedicure..all 4 involvemassaging that would make you feel good, would you say no..whilst i wear my little black number...hehehexoxoxmummaanytakers..lol
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RHP User
16 years ago
Do people still even say 'metrosexual'? to me they're just bogans who follow what's in the last few pages of FHM magazine.
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RHP User
16 years ago
Thankyou Jengirl. At last some stylish advice. :p For a minute there was I was beginning to wonder if I am the only styleKING here ~ (and Jean)! Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
16 years ago
Nothing wrong with being metro yanno....as long as you dont take it too far!Mmm...freshly showered...smelling foine...lookin good...stylin out...its a GOOD thing!!Especially when compared to a guy that thinks a pair of stubbies, a bonds singlet and a pair of pluggers constitute dressing up...lmfao!!Moisturising is good...foundation and eyeliner not so good....lolAnd no....DO NOT pop your collar...that is sooo like last decade!!JMO... (ner panda....I changed it...hahaha!!)BJxxx
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'Ridge_Forester' Hey Stalky... I was already a little worried about Jeano. Now that it's out in the open, and I've discovered that I'm a little bit girly, I'm starting to reconsider going on this trip. I like Jeano and all... but I'm a bit scared that he might like my man-smell a little bit too much... They say he's hung like a donkey, and don't want a donkey sneaking into my bunk while I'm asleep. I think we need to schedule a pre-departure crisis meeting... :P We need to deal with my product obsession. Hey there Ridge... nothing to worry about. I was reading Cosmo and did our compatability rating... it suggests we'd be suited as friends, but shouldn't push our luck. And trust me there's no way I can sneak up on anyone in a bunk with that massive donkey thing swinging around in front of me. I use heaps of product too... but I transfer it into some "Old Spice" containers I've collected at the old peoples home. Anything you smear on yourself from an Old Spice container makes you manlier. PS - Can you pack some extra St Ives for me - that shit is the bomb!! PPS - Don't listen to that Chiverly dude... he looks like he has his hand on it, and I'm yet to see someone back up the Metro-full world he is suggesting. And besides, the higher the standard these Metro's set, the harder it is for us brutes.
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RHP User
16 years ago
Ridge......darl Who ever that was in your shower............Tell her to get out !! after your fixing in Newcastle......come to Melbourne.....we"ll make sure the fixing is complete. youll be just fine...sweet smelling or all pheremoned up mmmmmmmm miss b
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RHP User
16 years ago
Ridge.. What the crappers are back wheels?? You just might be a pretty boy, But that depends on how many times a day you visit a mirror and how long you spend looking into it.. Pixie xxx
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RHP User
16 years ago
besides ridge your a PMS MAN ! and there seems to be a pandemic of them happening...... 22 year old son visiting last cpl days comes into my bed of a morning (its ok we both had jarmies on nothing terrible......mmmm bet ridge doesnt wear jarmies) anyway ..he wants to talk about this girl....... "mum....you know @@@ ?" "yes hun" "well....i think I might sorta kinda maybe be a bit like possible a bit fond of her " look of compassion and tenderness on my face ....mind thinking OMG hes doing a RIDGE ! trying not to giggle. "really...thats sweet " "yeah...im not sure...but i think i might maybe possibly ask her if she wants to like be my girlfriend on valentines day " so I ask...."is she THE ONE......look of fright on his face.....or is she THE ONE RIGHT NOW.......his ruffled feathers settle .......... I start to think............nah go to to cricket !! LOL So Ridge...you"ve started a fad a new phase....the PMS man......possibly maybe sorta........LOL cheers miss b
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RHP User
16 years ago
trash your joint in a drunken partyand acquire heaps of wrecked vehiclesfor your front yard. works for me.never ever been called metro.maybe a dero but never a metroahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaold Earl
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RHP User
16 years ago
bought a drumkit this week for$100 to keep up with the neighbours stereo.no metro's here man. they'd be to scared.ahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahaEarl
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RHP User
16 years ago
Wow' Whatta woman' offering herself to save mankind before the devil takes a hold of us poor souls....Not that I consider myself a metro sexual' but I probally need to be saved ' "just in case ". I like to take pride in my appearence' especially like to dress well and be clean shaven. I look after my body so the physique isnt too bad so if that qualifys me as a metro' Im affraid I might be in need for councilling. Baygirl' how long does the treament take... I dont mind putting up with some discomfort to save mankind from this awfull evil.. lol
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RHP User
16 years ago
Mate I am afraid to say ...YOUR A METRO.. But hey horses for courses mate some girls like it and others wont want to compete for the bathroom.
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'PixieOnPills' Ridge.. What the crappers are back wheels?? You just might be a pretty boy, But that depends on how many times a day you visit a mirror and how long you spend looking into it.. Pixie xxx Hello again Pixie... ;) "Back wheels" is another name used for the "nuts" or "balls". Us metro types like to keep them silky smooth... They make Veet For Men now... It's the best. I just rub it on, wait a few minutes, then hop in the shower and rinse it off. A quick once over with the Gillette Mack 3 to remove any rogues, and there you have it... Nice slick back wheels. It can be quite an erotic procedure if you're willing to use your imagination and have a little fun with it :P I've always been too scared to wax... I'm afraid of tearing my scrotum and seeing two little balls bouncing across the bathroom floor... or worse - down the toilet!! Not that I'd sit on the toilet to wax, but I reckon with the force these ladies pull that little wax strip off, it'd probably fling a nut a decent distance. Who knows where it might land?? The cat might even find it before you do... (not that I have a cat... that really would make me a metro). And I do look in the mirror a little bit... what's the metro limit? I'd be in the safe zone I reckon... Not many mirrors in my house...
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RHP User
16 years ago
Stalky and Jean... I promise I'll check into Baygirl's rehab centre and sort myself out. If I'm still not fixed, I'll head down to Missbowpeek's finishing school... Whatever it takes to get our van back on track (and keep Jean's donkey weapon out of my bottom bunk). I wanna be right before we get over to WA for the big wrestling match against Pixie and Sweet P... We were meant to wrestle in honey, but Pixie wants Bailey's now... She reckons we have to wear mankinis too. Her turf, her rules I guess ;)
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RHP User
16 years ago
"Two little balls"???? c'mon Ridge... that's not in teh spirit of RHP.. everything is so much bigger in RHP land. Mirrors... I never cease to amaze myself at how handsome Ive become. As for veet... you should scrub 'em with your sister's Loofah.. get's all the pubic hair off so you dont have to scrape your spudsack with your fingernails. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
16 years ago
you funny fuckaahahahahahahahahahahahaEarl
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'jengirl'Do people still even say 'metrosexual'? to me they're just bogans who follow what's in the last few pages of FHM magazine. Well that's just messed up, I think just a few to many ppl have it all mixed up as to what a bogan is.. Pixie xxx
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RHP User
16 years ago
and what the fuck IS FHM magazine.not seen that in LTREarl
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'mynameisearl2' and what the fuck IS FHM magazine.not seen that in LTREarl Correct me if I'm wrong. Here's some tell tale signs your a bogan.. Your wardrobe mostly comprises of black clothing maybe even a flannel, your shirts have your fave rock/metal groups on them.. Ie Metallica, Ac Dc, Lead zep.. Your jeans are a snug fit..The poobag looks just not you.. You once had or thought of getting a mullet.. Depends on how old you are!! Or just longer hair.. You can change that flat tyre with out getting into a panic and wondering who to call, You can fix that old car, bike, truck, bus or house hold appliance with out calling a tradie, Your fave magazines might just have hot rods n street machines in them, Your fave weekly papers the quokka or trading post, If you get sick or hurt you say.. Nah f**k that I'm not gonna see the doctor or go to hospital.. That's for pussies!!.. Face scrub That's for girls.. Earl I think the FHM mags like the guys version of woman's day.. Pixie xxx
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'PixieOnPills' Correct me if I'm wrong. Here's some tell tale signs your a bogan.. Your wardrobe mostly comprises of black clothing maybe even a flannel, your shirts have your fave rock/metal groups on them.. Ie Metallica, Ac Dc, Lead zep.. Your jeans are a snug fit..The poobag looks just not you.. You once had or thought of getting a mullet.. Depends on how old you are!! Or just longer hair.. You can change that flat tyre with out getting into a panic and wondering who to call, You can fix that old car, bike, truck, bus or house hold appliance with out calling a tradie, Your fave magazines might just have hot rods n street machines in them, Your fave weekly papers the quokka or trading post, If you get sick or hurt you say.. Nah f**k that I'm not gonna see the doctor or go to hospital.. That's for pussies!!.. Face scrub That's for girls.. Earl I think the FHM mags like the guys version of woman's day.. Pixie xxx I am hoping your exempt of bogan status if some of those things apply to you, but instead of saying: 'Could of', you say 'Could HAVE' 'Youse', you say 'You' and you use St Ives Apricot Facial Scrub *crossed fingers*
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RHP User
16 years ago
Am I a bogan as well now?
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RHP User
16 years ago
Quoting 'mynameisearl2'and what the fuck IS FHM magazine.Its what you read if you want to find the ultimate truth... :-
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RHP User
16 years ago
Here i was thinking i was just a knockbout bloke, when in reality it turns out i'm a.........................BOGAN Off to buy some veet to wash my face and get a manicure on my back wheels
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RHP User
16 years ago
I finally gve in to your advice Ridge and I bought some veet. I have to say it's not the best moisturiser I've ever used and it kind of made my eyebrows melt. What's with that? I don't think I was made to be a metrosexual.. I'll just stick with polysexual for now thankyou. Just going to the chemist to buy an eyebrow pencil. Bottoms up Stalky
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RHP User
16 years ago
You funny bugger. I don't think you like me much anymore... You're being a little mean :( Veet on the eyebrows hey?? You'll be using the Apricot Scrub on your back wheels next!! lol Hey what's a Polysexual. There is a girl up here who says "don't message me unless you're a Poly". Am I a Poly? Coz she's pretty cute and I wanna send her a message...
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RHP User
16 years ago
randy old front loader man.ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaEarl
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RHP User
16 years ago
thanx darl. iam bogan, hear me fart.ahahahahahahaahahahahahaEarlps i did have some blue jeans somewhere but i thinki cut the legs off to go swimmin in the dam
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RHP User
16 years ago
Sorry Ridge... of course I still like you much and all the more. You will know it if I mean to be mean and mean it, which I don't. Now, are you a poly? I really don't think so... not yet anyway. :p Bottoms up :p Stalkyboy
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RHP User
16 years ago
St. Ives Apricot Scrub and moisturiser - check - it's good to keep the face feeling fresh "Veet" the back wheels - check - so much better than lacerations Palmolive Honey Shower Milk - Arrrgh I've used that and enjoyed it too!!!!! Bugger me then Mr Pup must be a metrosexual too!!! Damn next I'll be shaving my armpits!!!! Oh well at least we're a tad closer to BAYGIRL so can pop up for some desanitising....BAYGIRL we need you!!!!
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